


kavaluan (means white lily here)

by ClaudiaFekete



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Magical, Aren't they beautiful, Asian Character(s), East Asian, Gen, Historical AU, Hopeful Ending, James Potter is a Good Friend, Japanese Empire - Freeform, Japanese Remus Lupin, M/M, No Smut, No beta we fall like tree leaves, Paiwan, Period-Typical Homophobia, Period-Typical Racism, Plants, Taiwanese Indigenous culture, do not copy to another site, ferns, the author tried
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-17 00:33:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29462817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ClaudiaFekete/pseuds/ClaudiaFekete
Summary: 1926, Taiwan. Japanese empire's prized colony. Remus needed an interpreter. Sirius volunteered.For R/S Romance Fest 2021. Prompt P52.
Relationships: Sirius Black & James Potter, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 3
Kudos: 3
Collections: R/S Romance Fest





	kavaluan (means white lily here)

**Author's Note:**

> Someone should ban me from writing love story ever again.  
> For your sake (and for mine), I preserve the anglicized given names. Family names, if appeared, have their meanings.  
> A better title, anyone?

After waking up Sirius found a headache due to hangover.

And a young man snoring quietly next to him.

He tried to push the faded-red cover over himself and realized he was lying on it. The young man – the boy – was paler than him. Most of the people breathing on this island wore a lighter skin tone than Sirius. It didn’t tell him much.

His alcohol ravaged brain couldn’t help him here either.

 _Don’t panic,_ he peeled himself away from tangling limbs, the soft hair on boy’s arms moving as if carried by a breeze. He listed what he knew, facts he could tell indeed existed. His name was Sirius. He would turn 19 this coming winter. He abandoned the family name deemed unimportant by the harbor and couldn’t be happier about it. He spent most of his time wondering on the street, often took in drinking and gambling and laughing with (or at) his best friend James –

– right, the one who had just burst into the room before Sirius could reach the door and screamed

_What the fuck are you thinking sleeping with a high school student!_

James was, of course, wrong about Sirius sleeping with a high school student.

They managed to convince the whole tavern of that.

It wasn’t as hard as one might have imagined.

Sure, Sirius didn’t have the best reputation. Some of his past experiences were quite frowned upon. People didn’t press on the matter since taking a willing individual to bed did not break any of the laws.

However, the whole harbor knew that James often saw things that only existed in his own head. Such as suggesting winks or loving smiles from a certain waitress.

 _Lily is falling for me,_ James whisper-shouted. He was sitting thigh pressed against thigh with Sirius on the same wooden bench. _Wait until you see._

 _I’ll believe that when she stops calling you a lunatic._ Sirius crossed his arms.

 _Why? It shows how much she loves me._ James raised his cup in a slightly threateningly gesture, drank. _Anyway, you sure you didn’t sleep with him last night?_

 _Of course not!_ Sirius’ brain was working better after some cheap tea in the morning. Now he could fully appreciate the fact that the boy remembered enough to attest his innocence. _A high school student is bad enough. A Japanese, high school student? I don’t have a death wish._

 _We won’t even find your body if he is related to one of the higher officials._ James winced. _For fuck’s sake, you didn’t even know his name when you took him back._

 _Now I’m hurt. I did know his name, alright?_ Sirius did know. It was just, the knowledge might have… escaped him during the mess this morning. He had no trouble remembering those soft curls (rare) and long lashes (like feathery wings). Enlightenment and era of exploration might be something well in the past, in the year of 1926. The racial diversity on the humble island of Taiwan hadn’t changed much though. Or, hadn’t changed in a way that people had trouble distinguishing the local and the newcomer.

If the boy’s mannerism didn’t sell him out as one of the colonizer, the accent definitely did.

Both Sirius and James came from the mountains. Their families had been living among the taro fields and odour-bark cinnamons for more than a hundred years. In Sirius’ case, more than three hundred. James’ parents brought him to the lower land when he reached 13. Sirius ran away after his mother was dead to join his best friend.

On the official record, Sirius was marked as “ban” in the ethnic group section. The word had meant “barbarian” when it was coined in China, and it retained much of its derogatory meaning after growing root in Japan. Few had called them “people in the mountain” to show respect. Most preferred the old usage. Especially scholars, for academic purpose.

People often say that Sirius was blessed, or a god must have molded him themselves. His forehead, perfect; lips, bold; shoulder, broad. His dark eyes glittering with silver. As if stardust was poured in them.

If the story had been set in Europe, people would probably say that he was sculptured like an ancient Greek statue.

Sirius was handsome, but he lived in East Asia.

The boy was the same age as Sirius. Sirius wasn’t aware that it might apply anything about himself.

Lupin Remus.

Long fingers. Cautious smile. Clean, washed out clothes. Ready for the fourth year of high school when others used three years to graduate. Almost expelled for rarely showing up in class. Said he had spent too much time in different mountains.

A young man conquered by the natural beauty of the colony, yeah.

Lupin was using the precious summer vacation to collect plants and visit tribes deeper in the mountains. That was why when Sirius hit him up on the road yesterday, he asked him where he could find an interpreter, a guide.

Apparently Sirius volunteered to be his guide.

Sirius wondered what could possibly persuade him to go back to the place he ran away from so easily.

Probably those soft curls. He fingertips itched from wanting to ran through them. Otherwise, Lupin wasn’t breathlessly good looking or effortlessly charming.

He didn’t think much about the friendly easiness Lupin carried. Didn’t think much about how he stuck a conversation with an old man over breakfast with both parties smiling. Didn’t think much about his voice, rough around the edge yet sincere.

 _I don’t need your money._ Sirius told him.

He saw the humiliation. Heard the _I consider it basic respect._

He saw one of the sleeves Lupin was pulling at, almost threaded.

_No, I mean, do whatever you think is right. But I’m going with you because I want to help you out, as a friend._

He wouldn’t dream of more. One like him shouldn’t expect more from a traveler. One like him shouldn’t expect more from someone educated when over 70 percent of the population, like himself, were illiterate. One like him shouldn’t expect more from a colonizer.

Officer in the chūzaisho had a long chat with Lupin before letting them into the mountains.

 _What was the police telling you?_ Sirius couldn’t help but asked. _That you shouldn’t be traveling alone?_

 _That they were worried. They were responsible for my safety even if I write it down on paper, telling the whole world nobody else should be held responsible for my own actions._ Lupin huffed out sharply. _My parents don’t even worry this much._

Sirius thought he might have heard bitterness.

He thought back to what his uncle had said, just before he passed away and left Sirius a small fortune. _Sometimes I hope our relatives didn’t try so hard to change us._

It’s sad how between the two extremes, there wasn’t much space left for one to live as comfortable as they could be. Sirius decided.

They didn’t stay the night in a tribe. Remus said that he didn’t want to disturb since he was coming alone. Sirius agreed and fed him with stories of rivalry among different tribes. Conflicts and small wars. Open armed conflicts declined in number after the Japanese came, of course. Gone were the days guns were traded freely, imported by Hakka and brought by men in different tribes.

Gone were the days the tribes collected rent from the Han Chinese farmers nearby.

Right now Sirius was worrying about the mosquito bites all over Lupin. The wound seemed puffier and the red more glaring on his moon-like skin.

 _Is it always like this in the south?_ Remus gritted his teeth, his nails pressed into one of the nastier bites. _I swear I’ve never met anything this bad when dealing with Bunun._

 _I’m not the frequent traveler here, kid._ Sirius shrugged off his shirt. His damp chest welcomed any kinds of winds after a whole day climbing up. _I’m setting up a fire. The smoke should help chasing away these annoying little monsters. You want to come out later?_

Lupin didn’t answer right away. When Sirius turned his eyes on him, he was rubbing ointment furiously over the same place, his head bowed. _Later._

In the low light, one of his ears were the faintest color of sakura flower.

Sirius had seen people fuming over adultery, broken pots, police, and on a rare occasion, his hair. He had never imagined anyone railing against a ‘lukue a wuqaljay’.

 _Well, they both have these little dots on the back of their leaves, don’t they?_ That was unhelpful. He knew.

 _Of course they have sori on their backs._ Lupin snapped. _They are ferns. Ferns produce spores and wrapped them in sporangia and clustered into sori and their shape can serve as another index for taxonomy. But these leaves don’t even look alike can’t you see?_

Sirius watched the pen in his hand moving violently, the tip swallowed by paper. He wanted to throw away the damn reference specimen laying on Lupin’s notebook. He wanted to pull him away from the flat stone that was currently serving as a table. He wanted to distract him from his worries, whether by drinking together, telling jokes, or kissing him. With each day going by he was more intrigued by how those lips tasted like.

He heard Lupin sighing. _I’m sorry. The professor told me that it might be a new species and he needed proofs._ Lupin’s hand was trembling slightly when he put the pen down. _You shouldn’t have to handle me being petulant._

 _No worries._ Sirius told him.

Deep inside he was thinking _please don’t do this anymore. I don’t need more proofs on how we are people from different worlds._

Sirius had told Lupin he was disowned by his family. Lupin agreed that they should avoid the tribe near majogao. They didn’t count in possible visits among alliance.

When Sirius saw Regulus – when he saw the boy wearing ‘atap’, eyes with similar glittering silver but darker – he almost turned and ran away. To where? He didn’t know. Anywhere but these piercing eyes. Anywhere than these people who had started whispering among themselves when Sirius’ little brother stopped in his track, halting.

Lupin didn’t understand at first, confused at Sirius’ sudden trepidation. He caught on quickly. He thanked the leader, the 'mazangiljan', profusely, and expressed the desire to leave. Sirius found himself disconnecting with every moment spent staying there. His head was filled with bubbles. His soul was hanging high in the air, watching his pathetic body too shaken up to say a word.

“Can I have a word with your interpreter though?”

 _No._ Sirius wanted to push his little brother away. He wanted to push everything around him away. The familiar sound was too much. He could hear his mother screaming from far away. Could hear her calling him a disgrace, ‘vatu’, names after names. Saw blurry image from years ago, his blood on the bamboo stick. _We have been the nobles before the strangers came to our land, before we accepted rent from them._ Father was watching. The man who married into her family. _The Hakka traded with us but they are still below us, don’t you dare flung yourself at one who betrayed their own people._ And he fought back with everything because James was not a traitor for leaving he was working for a better living. Who cared that the eldest child should succeed her place did she being the mazangiljan even mean anything in a time the police had the final say on everything. Rain soaking up kavaluan’s sweet scent his little brother crying the night after the funeral _how can you leave us like this –_

“You are always one of us.”

 _No._ Up in the air he felt light like the thinnest cloud. _Hadn’t been when I told you I wanted to do more than kissing to a boy and your face changed –_

He couldn’t tell is it was a bird chirping loudly, or his mouth build in blood and flesh giggling.

Sirius couldn’t recall much on how they left. Regulus almost patted his shoulder. He was so close. Then Lupin stepped in and held his forearm. Sirius saw the surprise. His eyes were wider than he had ever seen before. The boy was probably shocked by his own boldness. Sirius remembered, and would always remember then that Lupin had deep-brown iris. Rich. All encompassing. Tasted like earth after fire and rain. Tasted like healing.

Sirius learned quite something with the time he spent traveling with Remus. This weird structure anthropologist tried to put all human on earth in. The way to read a map. The “official name” of each green growing thing.

 _Why fern, Lupin?_ They were not on first name term, and Sirius recognized they never would be. _Why something that only grow in damp places, hidden between rocks?_

Remus took his time answering. _They didn’t flower, for one._ His long fingers were gentle lifting a piece of fern branched like antlers. _Sometimes… sometimes bright colors are too loud. For me. And they don’t walk away, you know? Animals do. They run or flap their wings. They vanish before you can get closer. Mineral is beautiful but lifeless. So that leaves plants._ He smiled his shy, little smile when he thought he was overzealous.

Sirius took the soft thing between his fingers. Put it in his palm. It felt like the paper Remus wrote on. It weighed almost nothing.

 _It’s blue._ Remus carefully placed another piece into his palm. _The color contrast beautifully when you put it next to the green one._

Sirius wondered if it was some kind of metaphor of them. He wondered what Remus felt about him as a person, not an interpreter.

 _Have you always liked teaching about plants?_ Sirius asked jokingly because he couldn’t say anything else in his head. Voicing anything else out loud would be asking something more intimidating than lust. Somehow one sun-rise and the next he had grown to love Remus not only for his appearance. He had learned the slow and winding thoughts, and the sudden out-burst of childish happiness. He didn’t know what he wanted anymore. It seemed as if he could want anything from Remus and will it wouldn’t be enough.

He saw the hesitation. Saw the secret, half-born smile.

He knew the answer before Remus opened his mouth.

_Usually I’m not this talkative, I’m afraid._

Remus planned to stay for one mouth. Their time together was coming to an end. He knew as Remus’ examined the specimen he collected, dried, and labeled.

 _Will you visit again?_ He couldn’t help but ask.

Remus chewed his lips. _I think I will. So much hasn’t been explored. The transparent flower we saw damaged by the rain, and –_

_Will you visit me again?_

Damn. He should have learned to hide the desperation better. He had always been not enough, or too much. Few could stand his temper. Fewer could stand his devotion. He burned and burned, and others had told him it was quite terrifying when they didn’t love him as fiercely. James told him again and again that he deserved someone who didn’t find his loyalty a burden. If they couldn’t return the flame, Sirius shouldn’t lower himself or quiet himself. Because there was nothing wrong in Sirius. He was different, not damaged. He was unique and extraordinary. James had probably saved a nation with a million people in his last life to be lucky enough to have him as his best friend. James would tell him all this and let Sirius pretend that there was smoke, to explain his tears.

Remus held out his hand slowly, and put it on his cheek delicately. Almost deferentially.

_If you thought –_ He swallowed. Adam’s apple moving up and down, like the waves crashing back and forth. _I want to write you long letters, send you postcard from the mainland, before I remember that you can’t read. Even so –_ He held himself back. Blinked.

Sirius seemed to get him here, seem to finally catch on with what he was saying. A wild, unbidden daring rose up in him. _I never told you before._ His voice shook. _One of the reasons why the people in tribe don’t want really want me back is not about the friends I made. It’s me. It’s how I act. It’s about who I once–_

Remus’ thumb moved to his mouth. He seemed to be holding back tears.

_Do you think we can see the moon tonight?_

Sirius had no idea where this came from.

_I’m not sure. Do you want to go out and check –_

Remus shook his head. His thumbed had moved away from Sirius’ lips. His whisper was no louder than the flame outside their tent. _If we get out of the tent, if we see the moon, I’ll tell you the moon looks beautiful tonight, and there will be no turning back. I will. I’m too reckless. I’ll forget what should never be forgotten, do you understand?_

Sirius didn’t.

Remus’ thumb carefully, fervently traced up to his nose, to his forehead, and down to his eyebrow, stopped, hovering before one of his eyelids like a small gray butterfly.

 _I wish you’ll forget this then._ His hand fell. Sirius’ heart plunged. _I would like to keep in touch. You’re my friend._

Nothing happened on their way back to the harbor.

Remus had booked a ticket back to his school in Taipei before he went into the mountains.

They bid their farewell.

On the day of Remus’ departure, Sirius woke, dressed, ate.

Thought:

_It is the exact same way I lived before I met him._

Thought:

_What an unbearable way of living._

Before James dragged him to the only hospital in town.

Before he found out why James dragged him.

Remus’ father – Kametani san – had sharp glares. Sirius would have been scared if he had never seen his mother outraged.

Kametani san seemed to feel that Sirius should be responsible for his son’s sudden SLE flare. Or for his son using a fake name to take a trip south.

Lupin was quite a weird surname, Sirius admitted. But how should he know that Remus was lying to him?

Remus’ mother was more understanding. _There’s nothing to apologize for._ In her soft yellow skirt, she was a quiet stream flowing on the forest floor. _He would have found another way into the mountains._

 _You’re different from what I thought you’re like._ Speaking to her made Sirius aware of his own volume. _When we started, he said that the police cared more than his parents did._

The sadness in her eyes. He had saw the same kind of sadness when Remus’s hand fell from his face. _There was a fight. His father never tells me what caused it. Since then it has been difficult for him to accept that we care._

_Do you? Is he allowed to have your love and go on being who he is?_

Her expression morphed into polite blankness.

Then broke, like red and yellow sprouting from shoots in spring.

 _I see._ She smoothed her skirt. _Don’t worry._

He saw something in her poise. In her steady gaze.

Sirius nodded, and believed her.

When Remus woke up, there was a boy sleeping in a chair next to his bed.

He stared.

Hair like rumpled silk, like ocean waves. Sirius.

Crap.

He decided that the best course of action was to keep sleeping, or to pretend asleep.

He pulled the cover over his head.

There were footsteps coming nearer. It sounded like a very familiar pair of leather shoes. Remus felt himself sweat some more under the cover.

Please don’t expose him. Please don’t let him see distaste in those eyes with glittering silver. He had always been a coward. Not so soon.

The sound stopped, next to where Sirius was sleeping. He heard rustling, Sirius’ breathing gained a clear silhouette.

 _It’s alright._ His mother said. _Have something. I’ll let you know when he wakes up._

Mumbling. His mother returned something. He heard the door closed.

A poke on his head. _Why?_

Remus wanted to tell her. Spilled it out. Fear held him back. To tell her without the whole story being pulled out from him seemed impossible. She hadn’t known yet. He had everything to lose.

 _I lied to him._ He stayed under the cover.

 _Well,_ his mother said. _you apologize, and see where you can go from there._

_It can’t be that simple._

_It can be._ There was a kind of hidden frustration and anger in his mother’s voice. He had never heard them before. _It can._

Remus was afraid that he knew what his mother was talking about.

 _He cares a lot about you._ Her fingers ran lightly on his shoulder. _Give him a chance to prove it, will you?_

Remus curled into himself. _Um._

_And, if a boy you’ve only known for a month can get a chance, can you give me one as well?_

His mouth was dry. It was different. Sirius knew things about him, things hidden from his mother. But he was foolish and weak, his heart was filled with ache and longing, he wanted to. He dreamed of what had been taken from him. He wanted the security back.

 _You will._ He managed.

Half an hour later, when Sirius rushed through the door and hugged him, he caught his mother’s eyes, and hugged him back.

**Author's Note:**

> The story was inspired by Kano Tadao. The change of place and indigenous group are deliberate. I was collecting materials for another story but this is the story I told in the end (a helpless shrug).
> 
> I'll work on the links later.
> 
> odour-bark cinnamon: the smell is stronger than ordinary cinnamon. Native to Taiwan. I like chewing its leaves. Taste spicy and sweet.  
> ban(番、蕃): This is probably like the ni**er word. I only include it here for historical accuracy. (sigh)  
> Chūzaisho (駐在所): Police post, basically. As heavily implied, the Japanese fought quite sometime before they gained control over the mountains for real.  
> Bunun: another group of Taiwanese Indigenous people. Theis traditional territory includes Mt. Jade (or Mt. Morrison, whatever that suits you).  
> lukue a wuqaljay: see the darling here  
> majogao: a Paiwan tribe. I get the name from "蕃族調查報告書", if my memory serves me right. The Japanese version exists somewhere. It has never been translated into English for what I know.  
> atap: The Paiwan name for _Lysimachia capillipes_. Its decoration is restricted to nobles. Here is how it looks like when being worn.  
> mazangiljan: The leader, the highest point of the power dynamic structure.  
> vatu: it means “dog” and is considered a swear word. Again, information taken from “蕃族慣習調查書”.  
> kavaluan: _Lilium formosanum_. Here's the beauty!  
> the moon is beautiful tonight: Anyone familiar with Japanese culture? This one from Natsume Kinnosuke. It basically means "I love you".  
> Kametani (狼谷): Guys, I worked so hard to find a Japanese surname that has something to do with wolf, to the point of ignoring the fact most Japanese who moved to Taiwan at the time came from Kyushu! It’s literally “wolf-valley”.


End file.
